Lynse Leanne

Heading into 2011 i was freaked out. 5 minutes before midnight i didnt want 2011 to come. It was unexplained. 2010 was not incredibly enjoyable but moving across the country is an adventure. But for some reason 2011 scared the crap out of me.

I know this is small in the grand scheme of things but i turn 25 this year. (hold back the snickering because of my fetus age). It scares me. I will officially be an “adult.” And my life is no where that i thought it would be when i was in High School. Do i regret the way my life has turned out?

Yes, a bit….but overall…no.

In the passing from 2010 to 2011 i decided that i have already made some decisions to put my life back on the course i thought i would be on when i was in high school and dreaming without a cheque book.

So instead of making many New Years Resolutions I am going to make my goals very simple.

Try and spend this coming year re-aligning my 25 year old life to the dreams i have had since i was young and back-burner because of my people pleasing nature and lack of money in the bank account. Because i know if i continue to go along with life and continue to back-burner these dreams in another 25 years i will regret where my life has landed.

With that said, my new year will be spent trying to figure out how to go back to school in the spring to start an associates (transfer degree) in Psychology. For what i want to do with my life i have a long road of school ahead, but i feel like it is so worth it. And other people have affirmed me in my desire.

so there it is. my 2011 will be spent reconciling my life to my dreams and learning to dream again. learning to dream without the costs running through my mind. Without boundaries that keep my tied down (within reason). And surrounding myself with people who dream and encourage my dreams….or as Chad calls them, “dream catchers”.

What are your goals or thoughts for 2011?

So those of you who have moved…when can the “lasts” start??

The other day i was driving and started to cry because i knew that i wouldnt drive over “that spot” once we moved.  It was the spot that the night before our wedding and the day of crazy tornadoes and weather we decided to move the location of our wedding to the same place as our reception…earlier in the day we realized that we had our last Stevens family Christmas…where we will be at Chad’s parents house in Mobile…the last one with the whole family.

as the days grow closer to the time we pack up and leave Birmingham and follow our dreams (48 days) i have begun to see life in lasts.

but i cant help but think it may be a little too early….what do you think?

I may have just drank the kool aid….or coffee…more than likely coffee.

Today i had my first impressions day at Starbucks. I know this sounds really funny, but it is a dream of mine to work at Starbucks and make coffee.

So today a part of that dream came true. as i am sitting there talking to the Manager i am thinking about all of my Starbucks memories… (and can i note that my computer said that Starbucks was spelled wrong because the S was not capitalized…haha!)

here are a few….

my close to first ever blog post called My Barista Crush Saves the Day like written when i was back on blogger….a long time ago!!

after Chad asked me to marry him and we went to Starbucks to celebrate with our friends…. and he used his connections to make this awesome sign!!

Just a lot of happy memories with Starbucks…and i am a total dork and am really really really excited about working there.  aaaaaaaaand today i got my apron.  i am now the proud owner of a Green Apron and a Starbucks Partner. The aprons a little dirty, but ummmm…come on!!

Have you ever had a job that you have dreamed about having?

This past Sunday night we started this little thing called “Dream Labs.” I don’t know if you have heard anything about it in the interwebs, but it is awesome. Spending some time and dreaming, talking about your dreams and being held accountable to achieving your dreams.

As we were talking a few people made the point that they stopped dreaming in Middle School….and come to think about it….so did i. But for reasons that others may not have.

The more we talked and the more i talked i realized that my dreams stopped when my life kicked into survival mode. After the abuse, after the move, after i vowed to keep quite….to keep those things my secrets…

My dreams for the future, what i wanted to be when i grew up all stopped when i was focused on tomorrow….surviving the junk that my life had handed me and needing to be “ok” until bed time. and then once i was rested i could wake up and fake my way through another day.

As long as i could remember i just remember surviving….not like the Destiny’s Child – I’m a survivor (I’m sorry, now you will have that song in your head all day…love me for it. ;) ) but like the fight to live you see in National Geographic survival. Just waiting for another day to pass so i knew i kind of made it closer to what ever my life might become….what i might stumble into.

I fell into 24/7
I fell into working in the Nursery
I fell into lighting
I fell into social media
I fell into youth ministry
I fell into everything my life is right now

Would i go back and change it? No….because i have some things to show for it…good and bad. But it has shaped me into who i am.

But now that i am in a season in my life where i am dealing with all the crap that i was “surviving” from and i feel like i am learning to dream again. I feel like instead of surviving until tonight, or tomorrow i can actually change the way my tomorrows are…i can become who i dream about being…who God has designed for me to become.

I am learning to live…

but along with that i am learning to dream.

And i have to admit, right now i feel like there are no boundaries…i can be what i want to be….

My life is finally back in my hands. I can see past tomorrow. I can dream.

My dreams were held back from my past….surviving my past instead of dealing with it….what holds you back from dreaming??

well i thought about typing out what was going on with us, but a video was more fun.

So, here is what is new with Chad and I with a rather big announcement….

these are exciting times for us….Thoughts?