Lynse Leanne

right before we were moving and in the chaos of boxes and no cable or a dtv converter or anything i was re watching LOST. because 1 – i love LOST and 2 – it was either that or static. i kind of felt like Desmond in the hatch…nothing really to do. anyways.

if you dont watch LOST please excuse the LOST talk…it is a good quote that resonates with me…not just a LOST quote. ;)

in season 3 episode 11 Sayid is flashingback to when he was being tortured to confess that he tortured a lady during his time in the republican guard (Iraqi Army). She comes in to talk to him, to have him confess…and this is what she says,

“After my husband and I first arrived to Paris, I was afraid to ever leave our apartment. So I would stare out the window of our apartment and I would see this cat looking for scraps. One day some children came to the alley and trapped him in a box. I watched them light firecrackers and drop them into the box. I could hear him howling from three stories above. And finally, I had a reason to leave my apartment. I rescued this cat, and I brought it home. It sits with me when I read, sleeps with me, and he purrs. But, every once in a while, he will bite me or scratch me. He does this because he forgets that he is safe. So I forgive him when he bites me, because I know what it is like to never feel safe. And that is because of you. So today, I ask only one thing of you. I ask that you show me the respect of acknowledging what you did to me. That it was you who questioned me, that tortured me, and that you remember me.”

when i heard that i started to cry.  i realized that it put into words what i feel at times.  what it feels like to never feel safe.  because of the abuse i endured i dont always feel safe. i have different fears that haunt me because of things that were done to me. and a lot of times i feel like that tortured cat…not feeling safe is a scary thing for me. because i wasnt safe then so i try so hard to feel safe now to avoid some of those feelings from coming back.

But i am so thankful that i have a husband who understands those fears and my need to feel safe. but who also understands that when i dont feel safe i get a little weird…i act like that cat. i do crazy things to have control to feel safe.

anyways…is there a quote in a song or a movie that “gets it?”  that you heard or read and you thought…yep, thats me…in words?

Sunday night Chad and I stayed with Chance while Jenni and Brian were at the hospital with their other son Paxton.

during dessert Chad decided that he should teach Chance spanish…and this is what we got.

Chad has started his new job at Whipple Creek. He is busy and loving it. I am loving it for him. He is doing what he loves…he is talking church and ministry. He is in a pastor role. he is considered a “pastor” but working on the licensing thing….you know, the legal mambo jambo. ;)

wait…did you just read that? my husband is a pastor! I am married to a pastor…and that makes me….

you guessed it…

A PASTORS WIFE.

I knew this was coming. I liked the idea of it. but then BAM…it hit me.

i have this picture and concept in my head of what a pastor’s wife should be like…and i am unsure i fit it. I know that if i am genuine and me it will all be good…but honestly it is the dang title that scares me.

I dont care too much for boxes and trying to fit in them and actually i heard this quote somewhere,

people who dont like boxes are those that dont fit in them…

and it is so true. I dont feel like i fit into the “pastor’s wife” box…or really want to. well, the stereotypical pastor’s wife box. There are freaking sweet pastor’s wives that are around… case in point Tam Hodge, Lori Wilhite, Brandi Wilson….and i can be like those pastor’s wives….just not the duggars like…not that she is a pastor’s wife. anyways, i digress.

all of that to say that the title and not the responsibility that freaks me out.  and i know it is just a title or a label or a box…but still it scares me.  ha!

Have you ever had a title, label or box that scared you?  do share.

Tomorrow is March 6th, 2010.

Tomorrow also means that Chad and I have been married for 700 Days. (Our 2 year anniversary is April 5th)

Facebook reminded us of this.

700 Days. It seems like such a long time. Yet it has flown by.

700 Days = 16800 hours
700 Days = 1008000 minutes
700 Days = 60480000 seconds

together.

[oh and this is what i did to do the math]

You should do the math of something and share it here!

Yesterday we left Birmingham.

24 hours after we intended on leaving Birmingham. But that is life.

So we loaded our lives into a U-Pack Relo Cube as well as a small U-Haul trailer and we are driving the country.

We stopped at a Hotel in Paducha Kentucky…probably one of the most comfortable beds i have ever slept in…or maybe it is that we are so tired. ;)

so now we have 16 hours to drive to Colorado Springs….but we are not in a hurry.

if you want to follow our trip i would recommend following me on twitter here.

we are so grateful for everyone who came to our party and all those that we got to see before we left….our lives are richer because of our friends…so thank you.

we are so excited about this next step…but for now we are taking a week of a rest and then will hit the ground running at Whipple Creek.

we would appreciate your prayers for safe travels as well as an all around good time.  love yall and have enjoyed and cant wait to do life with ya!