Talk it out
I am not going to try and hide the fact that i have been going through some rough things….i may not talk about them to everyone….maybe one day, but right now i am keeping it to a small group of people.
But as i have talked to some people about these things they just quote scripture back at me. They give me the truths from Gods word and i so appreciate that…but at the same time i am a processor. i need to think about things and talk them through….Some times it frustrates me when all people do is give me the “God is in control” or “Jesus loves you” or “God promises to ____________.” i need to process things through and talk them out.
it is the only way that i will deal with things. If i dont talk them through and process it i dont really deal with it. I am a believer in counseling….not for the rest of my life, but to have a safe place to talk things through when i need it.
oh, i’m the same way. verbal processor. i think the problem for friends, even good ones, is that they feel the need to say something positive, because they are for you. the problem is, it comes across like, well, like it has been for you :) i need to talk things out, then process them, then talk about them SOME MORE with someone who will let me, won’t judge me, but also over time won’t let me get away with wallowing. hoping you have that…but if you ever need that long-distance from colorado in an email setting, you know where to find me :)
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Um it really does depend on what the situation is.
I have some really great and supportive friends in my life. So generally Ill urn to them for a shoulder to cry on and also for advice.
If the situation is really bad sometimes I just withdraw into myself. I find a hole and Ill bury myself inside of it.
But for the mundane situations that are stressful I find Ill just take a few seconds to send up a quick prayer and take a deep breath.
But Lynse, whats wrong? What can I do to help? You have my number and if you feel comfortable enough sharing, text away!
i was just talking about this the other night. when i have issues/things to deal with….i rarely talk to people i know that will give me answers. more or less. i mean, i do at times. but my grandmother was always the best at this. she always helped me think through things by asking me questions. i have a few friends that do this. and this is my method of talking with others about their things.
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Can I please just tell you HOW much I can relate to your quandry!? I am a processor – big time – and can read scripture, be told it, already KNOW it, and feel at peace by the knowing and hearing it BUT “be still and know” comes ONLY after I have processed the problem, picked at it, turned it upside down, and looked at it under the microscope. I do think it is not an abnormal female trait. YEARS ago I started going to a “counselor” – specifically to talk through some really difficult things. I love it, and have been going (on and off )ever since. She hardly ever tells me anything that I don’t already know – just lets me process – and validates my feelings. The best piece of advice she ever gave me was to journal. Journaling clears the “muck” off the top of my mind so that I can get down to the meat of what’s going on. Sort of what processing helps to do. Once the noise is gone, I can absorb the scriptures AND the meanings much more clearly.
Hey!
Keep sharing. When you share your struggles you help the rest of us, too.
I, myself, am really bad at processing. Talking through issues and feeling my emotions are a big weakness for me. So I tend to isolate and that has led me to separation from Christ.
Whatever you do, please don’t follow my road. Isolation is a vicious circle. I don’t think anyone could love me if they knew the truth about me. I am the only one who can take care of me. So I isolate to care for myself. Then I find I am lonely. Why am I lonely? It must be because nobody loves me. I am the only one who can care for me, etc………
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i am a processor too…
most of the time the person i am talking to does not understand the need to talk….
they fix me or yell at me…
it is so freaking frustrating….
i think that is why i pace when i pray…its kinda like :talking it out with God:
i agree!!! I would way rather talk it out and process all of the outcomes… etc..
Sorry I put the greek on your facebook. It is I Cor 8:6, yes a scripture. And as you said, if that is not helping , it might as well be in Greek till you get to the poing where you can digest and live out scripture. A hero of mine from 1098 had a motto: “faith seeking understanding”, which is basically talk it out.